A kiss from the road (Gauteng Driving)

There is nothing as priceless as the look of disbelief on a pedestrian's face when you give them the right of way.  Such is life on Gauteng roads - that e-mail about the Basic Rules for Driving in Gauteng is spot on. 

Soon after becoming a Gauteng expat, Pansy decided it would be quite fun to buck the driving trend a little bit.  Of course, there are times when stopping on amber will get you rear-ended, and in those situations the prudent Petal drives through.  And Pansy seldom drives during rush hour, otherwise her tricks would not be possible and she just might receive a bit of road rage.  However, she does enjoy the dismay she sees in the rear view mirror when she stops on amber.  It's sort of like Pansy's personal candid camera.

And the irritation from fellow drivers when she's driving at 53 in a 60 zone.  However, most people lighten up when they see the dogs' ears flapping outside the window.

But back to the pedestrians.  They are truly priceless.  I don't mean the jaywalkers or tipsies that cause accidents.  Those the Petal does not like.  I am talking about the ones at the intersections or zebra crossings.  Some freeze with disbelief that a motorist is actually giving them right of way.  Others give Pansy the most wonderful smile.  The other day, 3 big mammas burst into a show of appreciation, giving Pansy the "you-go-girl!" thumbs up as they crossed the street.

And then the fellow drivers.  Not the ones behind the Petal.  I mean the ones she lets into the traffic.  Or lets out of their drive way.  Many a Gauteng driver will wait for what feels like an eternity to cross a road or change lane because no-one lets you in.  But not if the Petal is coming your way.  No, dear reader, you will get a friendly high beam flash to let you cross.  Petal loves the reactions.  Sometimes, as with the pedestrians, it is immobilised shock, because the other driver thinks that it's the "don't even think about crossing because I am coming at full speed" high beam flash.  But usually she gets an appreciative "thank-you" flash of the hazards, or lots of waves and smiles.  Just Pansy doing her bit for the Joburg driving fraternity...or should I say "frantic-ternity" 

And so it was last weekend.  Pansy was on a busy road, pottering along as usual, when she noticed that the next crossing had 3 very exasperated looking drivers waiting to cross.  She checked her rear view mirror quickly - no risk of getting rear-ended - so she flashed her lights and slowed down to let the cars through.  The first went, the second went.  Pansy checked her mirror again.  Someone was approaching but slowing down - all clear.  So she flashed again so the third car could go through.

The lady driving the third car was so ecstatic that as she turned right and drove past Pansy in the opposite direction, she quickly rolled her window down, and blew Pansy a kiss!

How's that for a thank you - a kiss from the road!

Pansy's Paws (I): Raymond and Evangeline

Pansy used to think that some people take their dogs far too seriously, until she got her own.

She always wanted to get pets of her own, and she had such fond memories of a childhood with lots of animals like tortoises, dogs, cats, ducks and bantams.

When she lived in Cape Town, she committed "pet adultery" with the neighbour's cat, who used to spend the whole day with Pansy and then go home to get fed.  It was nice to have the love without the responsibility.  Pansy thought the neighbour didn't click on to what was going on, but she did....

And when Pansy lived in Augsburg, her best friend, who also loves animals a lot and was missing her horse back home in Croatia, decided to smuggle a miniature rabbit into hostel.   And Pansy, being the designated aunt, was on "illegal dwarf rabbit baby sitting duty" every time her friend went home on holiday.  The rabbit was called "Bartok", until it soon transpired that "he" was actually a "she".....

But there came a point where Pansy did indeed want pets of her own.  Vet bills and all.  So she set out on a quest to find pet-friendly accommodation (not very easy), and when that was sorted, went to the SPCA.

Seeing the animals in the kennels is a very heart-wrenching experience.  A teary lady came up to Pansy and said,

"Excuse me, may I have a tissue?"

Pansy gladly obliged, although she was wondering to herself, "Why did she ask me?  Do I look like the sort of person that carries tissues around with her?"

There was one particularly sweet little brown dog in kennel A9.  A very happy-looking 2 year old.  He was there with his sister.  If you put your hand to the kennel so they could lick it, he would always push in infront of her.
"Me, me, me!!!!  You can love me!!!"

He's still like that....

And then in another row of kennels, there was the dachshund.  Well, she wasn't really there.  She was cowering at the back of the kennel behind the partition wall.

"Doggy, Doggy, " Pansy called.  But the dog didn't come out.

Pansy called and coaxed for another 5 minutes.  Then she saw a little nose peeping out.

Pansy went round the kennels a few times again, and then back to the Dachshund's cage.

"Doggy, Doggy...."  The kennel label showed that she arrived the day before, so she was probably terrified with all the dogs barking around her.  She was 6, and being an older dog, would be less likely to be adopted.

Pansy waited a few minutes.  She called again, and then the little Dachshund appeared at the back of the kennel.  She was shaking.

"Come Doggy..." Pansy said sweetly.  But the Dachshund just stood there, shaking.

Pansy went into the office to enquire after the little brown dog in A9.  Yes, he was available for adoption, a stray.  His sister already had a family interested in adopting her.   The Dachshund was also available.  Brought in from Sunninghill.

"Does she have issues?" Pansy asked.  Being an inexperienced dog owner, she didn't want to get a dog that would be difficult to have in a new home.  The lady replied that she's probably unsettled and nervous and that she would be fine once settled into a new home.  So Pansy went to the SPCA shop and got some dog supplies like dog bowls, dog jerseys and dog blankets, including a Mohair one for R20.

Pansy went back to the kennel with one of the SPCA staff.  They went inside the kennel and Pansy crouched down.  The Dachshund slowly came to Pansy, sat next to her, and lifted a trembling paw onto Pansy's knee.

It has been almost 18 months since Pansy, Raymond and Evangeline became a family.   They give her lots of laughs, tons of love, and the occasional grey hairs.

And yes, Pansy now takes them very seriously.

Evangeline (dachshund) getting used to having company.  She was an only dog.

Having company is quite nice.....

...especially for cleaning her ears...

...and for snuggling in front of the heater...

...or under the mohair blanket.  

Raymond is very playful, and wakes up when Pansy wakes up, which is before Evangeline, because Evangeline sleeps and sleeps and sleeps.  So when  Pansy wants to feed them or needs to go out, she calls Evangeline and then Raymond always runs to Evangeline and jumps on top of her blanket and starts pawing her, his tail wagging delightedly.  "Wakey-wakey Evangeline!!!!"

A new life with Pansy.

Gourmet Pansy: Yummy Spinach Soup

3 small golden delicious apples, chopped.
300g spinach preferably with stalks
3 large bay leaves
1,5-2 cups veg stock (or more if you want it thinner)
3 tbsp cream
1/4 tsp nutmeg
Pinch of salt.
A generous blob of Butter for frying (like 15g).

Method
1. Peel the fine outer layer off the spinach stalks.  You do this by putting your thumb with the nail facing you at the top of the spinach stalk, then using a paring knife in the same hand and snipping the top of the stalk towards you, using your thumb to stop the knife.  Then peel the thin film downwards.  Repeat for the other side.  The stalks give an interesting flavour and texture so it is better to use them.   Peeling will ensure the soup doesn't have an aftertaste on your teeth. Chop spinach.
2. Melt the butter on low heat.  Add the chopped apples.  Melt the apples gently for 10 mins.
3. Add the bay leaves.  Fry gently for 5 mins.
4. Add the nutmeg.  Fry gently for 3 mins.
5. Add the spinach. Fry gently for 10 mins, while stirring. Until the spinach is al dente.
6. Add the veg stock and bring to the boil
7. Cover, and simmer gently for 10 mins.
8. Remove bay leaves and blend.
9.  Stir in cream.  Add pinch of salt (optional)
10. Simmer gently for 5 mins
11. Serve warm

Tip: the soup should not be a deep green, but slightly lighter olive leaf green.  If it is a deep green, the spinach flavour will be overbearing and you don't have enough apples.

Gourmet Pansy: Softly Spicy Chickpea Soup

1 tsp candied peel
1/2 tsp lemon zest
1/2 tsp cardamom
1/4 tsp cloves
1/2 star anise
1/4 tsp ground ginger
1/4 tsp nutmeg
1/8 tsp coriander

or instead of the above, 1x 20g pkt Gingerbread/Lebkuchen spices plus 1/8 tsp coriander

3 Cups water
1 can whole tomatoes
1 large orange or yellow pepper, chopped into small cubes
1 Tbsp crushed almonds

Oil (vegan) or butter for frying

1 cup raw chickpeas soaked for 8 hours or 2 cans cooked chickpeas

Method:
1. Cook the raw chickpeas in the water.
2. While they are cooking, heat the butter/oil to low heat.
3. Melt the orange pepper on low heat for about 10 mins
4. Add the crushed almonds and gently pan fry for 3 mins on low heat.
5. Add the mixed spices and gently pan fry for 10 mins on low heat.
6. Add the tomatoes and simmer gently for 10 mins.
7. Add the cooked chickpeas and simmer gently for 20 mins.
8. Remove star anise and cinnamon stick.  Blend the soup. Add boiling water to thin the soup out to the desired texture.
9. Simmer for a further 10 mins.
10. Serve warm garnished with lightly roasted almond flakes.

Tip: Make a bigger portion of spice mix in the ratios above, then you can use it for other recipes without taking the time to measure everything. 

Gourmet Pansy: Pear and Gorgonzola Soup

(Copyright Blossom the Black Pansy)

(you can use Roquefort or Blue Stilton instead of Gorgonzola)

Serves 4-6
4 Tbsp oil (olive, avo, canola or sunflower, depending on the flavour you want)
6 pears, peeled, cored and sliced in thinnish wedges
500ml vegetable stock (you can add more boiling water later if you want the soup thinner)
1 tsp paprika
Juice of 1 lemon
150g Gorgonzola Cheese
Salt and freshy ground rainbow pepper to taste
Rocket or watercress to garnish

Heat oil in heavy based pan (preferably not non-stick)
Add pears and sweat for +- 30 minutes on low heat.  The pears are done when the kitchen starts to smell of pear aroma
Add paprika and sweat for a further 5 mins
Add stock and lemon juice and bring to the boil
Turn the heat down, while stirring add the cheese to melt it in
Puree the soup, add boiling water if you want it thinner.  Simmer for 10 mins longer
Serve warm

Gourmet Pansy: Rosemary Apple Crumble

(copyright Blossom the Black Pansy)

Prepare slowly with love.

1,5 kg apples, peeled and sliced (granny smith, preferably)
1 tsp lemon juice (you can leave it out)
250 ml (1cup) sugar split in 2 portions of half a cup each
500 ml (2 cups) flour
pinch of salt
125g butter (or margarine for vegan) at room temperature
cinnamon to taste (A teaspoon or 2 depending on how strong you like it.  I also add a pinch each of cloves+ nutmeg + cardamom; or allspice to make it a bit more interesting) 
A sprig or 2 of rosemary(optional)
Optional: liqueur or rosewater


Preheat oven to 200°C
Place sliced apples in ovenproof dish
sprinkle with lemon juice
sprinkle half the sugar over the fruit
sieve flour with cinnamon and salt (and the other spices if you are using them)
Rub butter into flour until mixture resembles breadcrumbs
stir in remaining sugar
sprinkle crumb mixture over apples
optional: "plant" the rosemary leaves here and there
bake 30-45 mins


Serve warm with a dollop of whipped cream, whipped with a dash of amarula or drop of rosewater if you want to be a bit adventurous.

Smiley Nice Guy (Love the one you're with)

"I can see this is going to be another conversationally challenged lunch."

The day that Pansy overheard "smiley nice guy" saying this was the first time she and "smiley nice guy" smiled at each other.

He was going to the canteen with 3 of his colleagues, all of whom were walking in the corridor with their heads buried in their cellphones.  

Pansy was walking in the opposite direction and passed the 4 gentlemen as "smiley nice guy" jokingly but truthfully said this to his cellphone-engrossed mates.  She looked up and chuckled as she caught his eye.  "A cellphone kindred," thought she.

Since then, she and "smiley nice guy" smile at each other when they see each other.  He is also one of the "earlies" that gets to work by 7 to avoid the traffic, and he sits opposite the boardroom where Pansy likes to escape for a few hours in the morning.  Petal needs her peace, and the people in the department right next to her have verbal diarrhoea at a very penetrating accoustic level.

Pansy has recently decided that she no longer socialises with cellphones.   Her boss has 2 blackberries, and he's convinced that he can multi-task and that it makes him more efficient.

But there have been too many occasions where she told him something while he was on the blackberries and then later on he had no recollection of hearing that information.  So now, if boss goes on the blackberries, Pansy just stops talking and continues with whatever she was doing before boss wanted to speak to her.  

As you can imagine, dear reader, boss nearly had a nervous breakdown that fateful October day when blackberry had a global network outage.  She printed the Hayibo about it for him, but he was not amused. 

And then there are the people who must constantly check the time, or send text messages during a movie or a live show.  Oblivious that the light from the phone is heck of a distracting for the other audience members and the performers.  It spoils the group experience.  Much like squeechy sweet papers.  The other day, Pansy got a chance to practise "calmly communicate your boundaries and honour other people's boundaries".  Live show.  Great seat.  Full of anticipation.  Squeech, squeech.....Curtain went up.  Squeech, squeech.  The popcorn was in a paper bag, in a plastic bag.  Pansy took a deep breath.  "Okay, maybe my neighbour will ditch the plastic packet."  Alas, it was not meant to be.  The squeeching continued, for 10 minutes.  It was not a long show, and it seemed like the neighbour was going to carry on squeeching.  So during an applause Pansy calmly leaned over - oozing serenity, and whispered calmly and sweetly,
 
"Excuse me...can you please get rid of the packet...."

I digress.  Back to "smiley nice guy."  These days it's hard to find a cellphone kindred.  Maybe that's why Pansy and "smiley nice guy" smile at each other - it's that realisation of "Yes, we are united in our principle of "love the one you're with" or, to put it a bit more bluntly, "can you please get rid of that f§%*ing cellphone because it makes me feel like the cellphone's company is more important."

Pansy went looking for some cellphone kindreds, and found them on the internet.  Oh yes, it was some or other online forum where people were moaning about cellphone etiquette.  Apparently, in America there is some or other device that can block cellphone reception.  It's not legal, but some people manage to get one and then they use it when they are having dinner or at a cafe or so.  I suppose it's easier to just turn on a gizmo than to ask your friend to leave their phones during dinner.

So apparently (also in America) cellphone companies are starting cellphone etiquette campaigns.  The thing is that cellphones are not just cellphones anymore.  There is so much that we can do with them, which makes it harder to just leave it for a few minutes or even hours.  At some Broadway theatres, they already ask people not to use their phones at all, explaining that the light is distracting for the audience and performers.

 


I wonder when cellphone etiquette campaigns will be launched in South Africa.  Until then, Pansy is on her own little solo campaign.  In the interests of her sanity preservation, no more socialising with cellphones.  Even if the cellphone user is her boss, whom she likes a lot, or her friends, who she loves a lot.

And she will keep looking out for cellphone kindreds like "smiley nice guy" who have very witty ways of communicating their cellphone-in-company preferences to their friends.
 
"Conversationally challenged lunch." - I like it!